I’m tired. I’m angry.
I’m angry about the fact that I got totally screwed over tonight, and nobody seems to care. 50 arrivals, and just me working. Because J, the guy that was supposed to work with me tonight, “had a lot of things going on at home” and therefore had to leave at 3, right when I got here.
I’m angry that there have been 50ish arrivals, and I haven’t had a break, or a second’s pause, or even been able to talk to B.
I’m angry that this seems so unfair. I’m angry that I know that no one else would have been stuck BY THEMSELVES on a night like tonight, except for me.
I’m angry that B apparently needs lessons in answering the phone. And I’m even more angry that I feel he’s the only person in the world that could brighten my mood.
I’m angry that I can’t even have a free fucking second to simply cry. Because I know I need to. I know the stress of the last 6 hours have worn me down, and all I need to do right now is cry.
I’m angry that B got to sleep in all day today, while I’ve been busy having the worst day of my life.
I’m angry that the lady with this group that’s coming in is a dumb bitch. She blamed me for getting her directions wrong because SHE told me that she was coming from the wrong direction.
And I’m angry that I have to still be nice to her.
I’m angry that there feels like there’s no one to lend a helping hand. There’s no one to even lend a shoulder to cry on. And I am so angry that I won’t even get a Thank You for having my ass handed to me all day long.
I’m angry that I still have to work here. I’m angry that I’m treated like a slave, servant, stupid hand-maiden and that I can’t tell people off.
I’m angry that I still have at least another 2 hours here. And nothing seems to be getting any better.
I’m so angry that I pretty don’t care what kind of job I’m doing, as long as something gets done. In my current state of mind, that’s pretty much all they’re going to get.
I’m so angry that I don’t feel bad that I spent almost a whole FIFTEEN minutes in the back office. And if they approach me about it, which they won’t, I’m going to tell them to take it up with the angry chick that was working Tuesday night.
I’m angry that I still have another 2 nights of this bullshit to go before my weekend.
I’m angry that I don’t even know yet if I get 2 days off together.
I’m angry that both yesterday and today, my partners for the evening have been allowed to go home. But I know full well that if it had been me to work the midshift, there’s no way in hell I would’ve been able to go home early.
I’m angry that no one else would’ve been asked to go through such a night by themselves, they wouldn’t dare do this to anyone but me.
I’m angry and all I want to do it cry, get in the fetal position, and go to sleep. And never, ever wake up.
And I still want some goddamn Fettuccine Alfredo.
Eep. Love the new masthead. But eep. I hope tomorrow is a MUCH better day. The bastards.
You deserve to be angry!
There is nothing worse that knowing you need just two minutes to have a few sobs, and breathe, yet no one giving you an instant to do that.
Drown your sorrows in yummy fettucine, my dear.
And no apologies in the title- that’s what us, and the blog, are here for!
Take it out. It makes you feel a little better. Also, stop mentioning The Fettucine, I’m drooling over here. And seriously? I can’t be eating something that creamy. My hips will kill me if I do.
Heart you!
sometimes jobs can be frusterating. and blogging is a great way to vent. sometimes the best way. p.s. fettucine alfredo does sound really good…