Just take it easy, that’s the rule.

(You know that song by Dinah Washington that’s now being played every 2 minutes on DoubleTree Club commercials? I LOVE that song. It’s also my theme for today.)

I am speaking to you from hour 13 of 15 during my day. Hour 1-8 went by rather smoothly. Then, my body hit a wall, and I am hardly able to stand without grimacing and having to hold back tears.

I am tired. Very tired. My legs are all wobbly, and the lack of food intake for the day is taking its toll on me. As well as the borderline-obscene lack of sleep for the past two nights.

It’s a very good thing that my boss/friend let me off the hook for tomorrow. Because I’m like 52% sure that I would die if I had to work longer than my 2:45p-9 tomorrow. Seriously.
But! But? (Hehe. I just said But But. Oh wait, that’s not very funny. That’s not like Kay, So. Or But..Fuck.)

It was totally worth it. My day, at least the first part of it, went as smooth as room temperature butter on freshly cooked pancakes. (Thanks IHOP. I am now obsessed with calorific pancakes!)

For the first time in my entire life, I’m looking forward to going back on Wednesday (After resting up, of course). I not only felt productive, but useful! My job was more than just sitting there occupying space until the next person needs your assistance. I had a to do list. I contributed to the success, and if I had sat on my ass? SOMEONE would have noticed!

It’s like stepping into another universe. (Also, am currently obsessed with Star Trek. Again.) I mean, there’s just no comparison from the work I do now to the work at The Store to the work I do (or don’t do) at The Hotel. It’s literally like I’m working someone else’s job.

I’m not supposed to be appreciated! I’m not supposed to be depended on for something other than showing up! This is weeiirrd. Will someone show me how to take compliments now? Because I’m getting them from every direction.

For the first time in OHH…About EVER, I left work feeling better than when I went. It’s not just the compliments that boosted my attitude, but the fact that they were all true! I did catch on right off the bat! I did have something to immediately contribute to the company. I did do a good job.

I don’t know that I’ve been doubting my abilities this whole time, per se. I just think that I haven’t been challenged enough to fully realize what I’m capable of. I think part of me wondered if I was ever going to make it beyond The Hotel, or The Coffee shop. I mean, my brain knew, but I didn’t really have the confidence to truly try.

This whole time I was nervous, worried that I wouldn’t live up to the hype, to the expectations set for me. But you know what? I totally did.

And even though the 5 1/2 hours I worked at The Store was followed by 10ish hours of working at The Hotel,  I’m about 91% sure that it was totally worth it.

It feels good. Knowing that you’re something that is …worth it to prospective employers. That even though you’ve known it all along, you’re destined for much more than you could dream of. Because know you know. You know now that within you lies all the tools you’ll need to make it. You know that you not only have the ability, but have the determination to stick through it all. To crawl from the very bottom, and become something that may just even surprise the toughest critic: yourself.

I’m sure this is every day stuff to most of you, because most of you have great jobs that you, even if you won’t admit it, enjoy. This is a first for me. I’m venturing to uncharted territory for me, going beyond my comfort zone, and though I will possibly meet enemies that I may never have thought would have existed, I will make it through. (Again, with the Star Trek references. I know. I’m done now.)

Alright, now that I’m done spewing cheese all over you fine folks, I’m going to leave. Possibly to cry about the intense leg pain, possible to gorge myself on food. Possibly even to fall asleep. We shall see.

We shall see.